This is the guy who once punched a man in his soul...
Also known as Greg's biological father Chuck Norris.
When the Boogie Man goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to l ive.
Outer space exists because its afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC claiming Law and Order are the trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity-twice.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite, he bites frost.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make him drink.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table because he only recognizes the element of surprise!